So, I’ve been thinking about writing on this for a while. I have often
put it off with an “It’s my beliefs, why do I have to explain them?” Well,
because I’ve decided I want to. I know this is going to piss some folks off and
that’s ok. This isn’t about you, it’s about me, because in my world, it’s
always about me ;) I’ve included some links and such at the end. Read if you
want, or don’t, your choice.
As most of you know, my sons have been a part of Scouting since they
were each in the first grade and now they are Boy Scouts. I heart Scouts.
Seriously, I love what they teach, self-reliance, leadership, life skills, PLUS
they randomly take my children away for a week or weekend for camp so dad and I
can have “let’s pretend we’re not parents” time *wink-wink, nudge-nudge* My
boys have really enjoyed Scouts and the socialization of it. Hubby and I have
both been leaders within the Cub Scout pack and are committee members still.
Now, it’s pretty well known that the Boy Scouts of America (herein
known as BSA, cause I’m not typing the full name every single time, I’m too
lazy for that) have recently undergone some changes regarding membership, most
specifically, whether or not to allow openly gay youth to join and openly gay
adults to be leaders. Well, a positive step was made and as of January 2014,
openly gay youth can join (YAY!!) http://www.scouting.org/sitecore/content/MembershipStandards/Resolution/Resolution.aspx
but unfortunately, openly gay adults cannot serve as leaders. That’s another step the BSA has to come to,
but we need to keep encouraging the BSA to realize they have so many people
with so much to bring to Scouts if they just allow it.
UPDATE: IT PASSED!! http://www.scouting.org/sitecore/content/MembershipStandards/Resolution/results.aspx
UPDATE: IT PASSED!! http://www.scouting.org/sitecore/content/MembershipStandards/Resolution/results.aspx
I talked to my sons when this topic was starting to get really heated
and asked them what they thought, since it would directly affect them, not me.
I asked them if they thought openly gay boys and adults should be allowed in
Scouts. They said the exact same thing “Why not?” That’s a damn good question,
“Why not?” I see nothing in the Scout Law or Scout Oath (links and other at the
end of this rant) that OUTRIGHT says to discriminate against openly gay people.
I know there are a lot of people who are going “It says ‘reverent toward God’
and ‘Duty to God’!” Yup, you’re right folks, it does. But these duties and the
reverence are based upon the Scout's religious beliefs, not mine or yours
(unless they are the same as said Scout). I can hear you now, “It also says
‘morally straight’!” Again, you’re right. Based upon who’s morals? What does
moral mean? Simply put, it means a ‘right behavior’. What we seem to forget is
in some areas people agree on what’s right and wrong and in other areas people
differ. Who’s way is the right way? Unfortunately, there are those who believe
that their way is the only way. Well, it’s not. I don’t say this to be incendiary,
just honest. Your way just might not be my way and vice versa. I’m not saying
my way is any better…for you, but it is better for me.
I know other people are thinking about pedophiles/hebephiles, you know,
the people who are attracted to pre/pubescent children. Well did you know there
are pedophiles and hebephiles who DO NOT ACT upon those feelings? Ok, what about
child molesters? Well, are people aware that they are different from pedophiles
and hebephiles? They are different. Child sexual abuse is the actual act. Child
molesters are the people who actually act upon the drive. I could give you all
kinds of reasons why they do it, but you go do the research, there’s a
multitude of reasons and I don’t feel like typing that much. The BSA got smart,
finally, and instituted two-deep leadership and one-on-one interaction between
Scouts and leaders (non-family of course) is prohibited. This protects the boys
AND the leaders.
Now, let’s get to the sex factor of it. Let me start by saying one
thing. Boy Scouts is made up of TEENAGED boys. You really want to try and
convince me they aren’t thinking about sex already? HA! “But Anne, letting
openly gay boys into Scouts will put my child into a position where the gay boy
may hit on my son.” Yeah, ‘cause that can’t happen anywhere else, you know,
like school, grocery store, parties. No
matter what the situation it all comes down to the morals you believe in that
as a parent, you instill in your child AND your own child’s views on the
matter. I’ve noticed that when it comes to kids, they speak their mind. Yes,
peer pressure is still there, but it’s everywhere *sad face* not just in Scouts
or schools. “They are going to make my child gay, I just know it.” It’s a sad
fact that people really belief sexual orientation is a choice. I say look into
your past and tell me the moment you DECIDED you are straight. I can’t tell you
when I decided I like guys, I’ve just always been that way. You know, from what
I understand, it’s pretty much that way for gays too, they’ve just always been
that way. I’m not even going to go into normal sexual experimentation with
teenagers, no matter their sexual orientation.
“What about the politics of it?” Welcome to America where politics are
everywhere!! You cannot avoid them! It’s both a blessing and a bane in this
country (my beliefs, not endorsed by any particular politician). Can’t escape
them, no matter where you go.
The distraction factor!! This will distract our kids from what they
need to be doing at Scouts. Does it distract them at school? Kids in this time
are more exposed to homosexuality than we were. It was an unknown and we didn’t
fully understand then, but even back then, there were those of us who just didn’t
care who people were sexually attracted to, we were just more interested in who
was sleeping with who (gossip!!). Now, more kids feel that way.
Something else that needs to be thought about. Scouts are losing leaders. Well, not necessarily losing, but they sure aren't gaining many. Why do we have to judge a person’s ability on who their bed partner is? We don’t with heterosexuals. Scouts need capable adults to be leaders and GUIDE our boys (and girls in Venture Scouts). Why are they eliminating a person who could bring so much to Scouts that has NOTHING to do with sexuality? Knot tying has nothing to do with sex (in Scouts, your personal life is your business).
“Oh Anne, you’re just saying this because you’re a Social Worker.” Um,
nope. I’m a Social Worker because this reflects how I feel. I’m not a perfect
person, not a perfect parent, and not a perfect wife, but that’s ok, because I
am a pretty rockin’ person, a good parent, and an awesome wife (just ask my
husband, he’ll agree). I try hard to be a good parent, wife, friend and person.
I accept your beliefs as that, your beliefs and that’s cool with me. You don’t
have to accept or like mine, that’s cool with me too, ‘cause I’m pretty
comfortable with them, I don’t need your acceptance or approval. Unfortunately,
we live in a world where people are judged on their beliefs instead of their
actions. I try to act in a way that will not hurt others, but I’m probably not always
successful at that.
I still love Boy Scouts, but I don’t depend on them to teach my child
what to believe, that’s the responsibility of their dad and I and we take that
seriously. We have tried to teach them to be responsible human beings, to know
people for themselves, not their beliefs. To “do unto others as they’d have
done onto them.” To find their own beliefs and stand by them, so long as they
do not hurt others. I look at my boys and think we’ve been pretty damn
successful in that. They’re good kids and we’re proud of them.
Links:
The Meaning of the Boy Scout Law
Ø
A Scout is Trustworthy.
o
A Scout tells the truth. He is honest, and he
keeps his promises. People can depend on him.
Ø
A Scout is Loyal.
o
A Scout is true to his family, friends, Scout
leaders, school, and nation.
Ø
A Scout is Helpful.
o
A Scout cares about other people. He willingly
volunteers to help others without expecting payment or reward.
Ø
A Scout is Friendly.
o
A Scout is a friend to all. He is a brother to
other Scouts. He offers his friendship to people of all races and nations, and
respects them even if their beliefs and customs are different from his own.
Ø
A Scout is Courteous.
o
A Scout is polite to everyone regardless of age
or position. He knows that using good manners makes it easier for people to get
along.
Ø
A Scout is Kind.
o
A Scout knows there is strength in being gentle.
He treats others as he wants to be treated. Without good reason, he does not
harm or kill any living thing.
Ø
A Scout is Obedient.
o
A Scout follows the rules of his family, school,
and troop. He obeys the laws of his community and country. If he thinks these
rules and laws are unfair, he tries to have them changed in an orderly manner
rather than disobeying them.
Ø
A Scout is Cheerful.
o
A Scout looks for the bright side of life. He
cheerfully does tasks that come his way. He tries to make others happy.
Ø
A Scout is Thrifty.
o
A Scout works to pay his own way and to help
others. He saves for the future. He protects and conserves natural resources.
He carefully uses time and property.
Ø
A Scout is Brave.
o
A Scout can face danger although he is afraid.
He has the courage to stand for what he thinks is right even if others laugh at
him or threaten him.
Ø
A Scout is Clean.
o
A Scout keeps his body and mind fit and clean.
He chooses the company of those who live by high standards. He helps keep his
home and community clean.
Ø
A Scout is Reverent.
o
A Scout is reverent toward God. He is faithful
in his religious duties. He respects the beliefs of others.
The
Meaning of the Boy Scout Oath
Before you pledge yourself to any oath or promise, you must know what
it means. The paragraphs that follow will help you understand the meaning of
the Scout Oath.
On my honor . . .
By giving your word, you are promising to be guided by the ideals of
the Scout Oath.
. . . I will do my best . . .
Try hard to live up to the points of the Scout Oath. Measure your
achievements against your own high standards and don't be influenced by peer
pressure or what other people do.
. . . To do my duty to God . . .
Your family and religious leaders teach you about God and the ways you
can serve. You do your duty to God by following the wisdom of those teachings
every day and by respecting and defending the rights of others to practice
their own beliefs.
. . . and my country . . .
Help keep the United States a strong and fair nation by learning about
our system of government and your responsibilities as a citizen and future
voter.
America is made up of countless families and communities. When you work
to improve your community and your home, you are serving your country. Natural
resources are another important part of America's heritage worthy of your
efforts to understand, protect, and use wisely. What you do can make a real
difference.
. . . and to obey the Scout Law; . . .
The twelve points of the Scout Law are guidelines that can lead you
toward wise choices. When you obey the Scout Law, other people will respect you
for the way you live, and you will respect yourself.
. . . To help other people at all times; . . .
There are many people who need you. Your cheerful smile and helping
hand will ease the burden of many who need assistance. By helping out whenever
possible, you are doing your part to make this a better world.
. . . To keep myself physically strong, . . .
Take care of your body so that it will serve you well for an entire
lifetime. That means eating nutritious foods, getting enough sleep, and
exercising regularly to build strength and endurance. it also means avoiding
harmful drugs, alcohol, tobacco, and anything else that can harm your health.
. . . mentally awake, . . .
Develop your mind both in the classroom and outside of school. Be
curious about everything around you, and work hard to make the most of your
abilities. With an inquiring attitude and the willingness to ask questions, you
can learn much about the exciting world around you and your role in it.
. . . and morally straight.
To be a person of strong character, your relationships with others
should be honest and open. You should respect and defend the rights of all
people. Be clean in your speech and actions, and remain faithful in your
religious beliefs. The values you practice as a Scout will help you shape a
life of virtue and self-reliance.
Note that the Boy Scout Oath has traditionally been considered to have
three promises. Those three promises are delineated by the semicolons in
the Oath, which divide it into three clauses. The three promises of the
Scout Oath are, therefore:
Duty to God and country,
Duty to other people, and
Duty to self
DUTY TO GOD AND COUNTRY: Your FAMILY and religious leaders teach
you to know and serve God. By following these teachings, you do your duty to
God.
Men and women of the past worked to make America great, and many gave
their lives for their country. By being a good family member and a good
citizen, by working for your country's good and obeying its laws, you do your
duty to your country. Obeying the Scout Law means living by its 12 points.
DUTY TO OTHER PEOPLE: Many people need help. A cheery smile and a
helping hand make life easier for others. By doing a Good Turn daily and
helping when you're needed, you prove yourself a Scout and do your part to make
this a better world.
DUTY TO SELF: Keeping yourself physically strong means taking
care of your body. Eat the right foods and build your strength. Staying
mentally awake means learn all you can, be curious, and ask questions.
Being morally straight means to live your life with honesty, to be
clean in your speech and actions, and to be a person of strong character.
Scouting is truly a melting pot. Scouts come from all walks of life,
all types of family units, faiths, and racial and ethnic groups. The BSA
respects the rights of people and groups who hold values that differ from those
encompassed in the Scout Oath and Law, and aims to allow youth to live and
learn as children and enjoy Scouting without immersing them in the politics of
the day.
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